none of my music sounds good.

i keep diagraming the same thing on the whiteboard.

i am now going back to the fundamentals. figuring out where i was in my design. i have implemented all of this, but never really had a plan. i just saw how it went. and that is pretty good. maybe i should just try to stick to that instead of trying to force it into a drawing.

the problem is that i am now thinking about two applications. and linking them, yet building them both at the same time. loose coupling. it’s a great idea, but a lot of work. less overall though. slower going i suppose.

policemen are turning in their badges.

i feel very frustrated right now. like i got a mean case of writer’s block

so. i just pulled up the source code running this site. it is php. a modded version of wordpress, because i am too lazy to write an admin backend, and wordpress is pretty robust and resilient. however, i discovered that my site had been hacked. for the last unspecified amount of time, i have been serving up spam for…. damn i have already forgotten the url.

that is pretty low though. inject 216Kb of useless links into someones header file. they didn’t even have properly structured html. there was a “u” tag. then a hanging </div>. it’s like those email spams asking you to give away your bank information in broken english. i always fall for that. and i have yet to see the $500M promised by the late Mahudashiga Ruwalikus. come on skeezy manager, give me my rightful cut!

why is your mother’s maiden name a secure passphrase? are we all that foolish? or do we on some level admit to ourselves that security is obscurity and no security at all.

the clouds corrupt people into thinking randomness is acceptable. their structure can only been seen with special eyes, or a special mind. i have seen it once. it is beautiful. giant snowflakes rotating like cog wheels. transperent and miles deep.

i never want to smell like that.

solomon had a key. it was a ring. i think i know what was on it. it was the secret to all of his power.

live through this and you wont look back. it was said three times and i’ll say it again. i love you.

i don’t even know how to imagine you. you probably feel the same.

i need to evolve. i need to learn how to work smarter all the time. find out how to save time. like i can imagine markaby is way better than chugging html. it is so clunky.

i just felt like was talking to someone. i think it was myself.

if i knew then what i know now i would never know what i now know

now i see why ignorance is bliss. at least when it comes to major economies. the less people know, the easier it is for the Fed to buy all of our assets with our money.

the fact that the US economy is still stumbling forward today astounds me. the dow gained 169 points. go figure. if we all pretend it isn’t happening, is it?

we must pay the piper at some point. i wonder when it will be. and what our reparations for our ignorance will be. i am willing to bet it is slavery. like legitimate old school slavery. we will be miners for gold again. all day and all night. for our entire petty lives.

do you expect to recieve things you are unwilling to give?

do you expect something out of nothing?

are you a satanist?

or do you think religion is completely seperate from economics?

like i was telling my mom today. math is prevelant everywhere. and it is our arrogance and ignorance that has allowed it to fade out of our modern design. the good stuff that comes out. it has math in it. just like the temples of old. these people discovered how to imbue the power of god in their design. everything is structured and placed. everything is intended. and to the untrained eye, you gloss over it.

the book of daniel talks about four beasts. the first was the romans. the second was ghengis. the third was napolean. and the fourth, well it has been out there for a while, under the covers of prominent facists. it took shape as hitler and mao and stalin and blair and it is now culminating with bushy. the three horns have fallen. wtc1, wtc2, wtc7. and then it spoke vehemently “you are either with us, or with the terrorists”. it devoured everything with its vicious metal teeth and the rest it is desperately trying to stamp into the ground.

but you can’t treat us like that. we are done with totalitarian leadership. we are ready for the true messianic age. we are ready for an age of peace and humility where we can all get along and participate to conceive a better world for us all.

we are ready to see that when we give unconditionally to others, that it is ourselves that are the most rewarded. not with monetary invisible worthlessness, but with true rich rewards of hapiness. we give because we can. and making everyone better makes you better.

fuck the scarcity idea that is so prevelant today. the idea that if i don’t beat you, i don’t eat. we all eat. and sometimes competition is fun. and it is exhilarating to best someone, but it is never acceptable to beat someone. especially when you cheat to win. when you aren’t honest. when you don’t have your competitors best intentions in your heart. when you hope they do as well as they can so that you have a true challenge.

there is enough for us all. and we all deserve the best standard of living we can sustainably afford.

if i am paying you two cents an hour to produce my good and you live in poverty and slave your ass all day so that i can enjoy a can of soda, that is fucked. i am looking for a solution to share wealth and value with the entire world.

i do not have it yet, but that is not going to stop me. in fact, that is the reason i am so invigorated. this is a true challenge. whether we can equalize the global wage gap is one thing that i can not do alone, but enabling every adult in the world to participate equally in legislature, that is something i can do.

that is something i AM doing.

if i look back on my life. i am proud. i am beginning to spend every moment of my life working toward a positive end. i am concious of my word. i am concious of my actions. i am beginning to understand grand design. i am beginning to understand the fundamentals of life and creation. i realize the importance of everything.

i no longer take anything for granted and am willing to always work toward liberty no matter what the circumstances.

loved or unloved by others is irrelevant. i love myself. i am proud of what i am doing. i am trying to respect those who aiding and abetting me.

and i still have faith in the people. i can show you the alternative. THERE IS HOPE. plus i love good music. and hoolaulea is tomorrow. not really good music, but block party! positivity. unconscious positivity, but none the less, people are feeling good and determined to have a good time even though you know it is going to rain. that is how hilo rolls. roles.

alright. i have to get some work done. i will probably start blogging again as soon as i post this though. the channel is is open.

wicker wicker rattan rattan as they say.

i stared tragedy in the face and said i don’t care. in fact, i didn’t even understand.