i have been juggling more and more. even after dislocating my shoulder harvesting bananas. note to self. innovate. the discipline bears. sitting like god, not so much.

i got in with the hawaiian mafia today. i am not sure, but i was chosen. either my delusions are becoming contagious, or i am actually on to something. he read my mind, so why hide anything? you’ll soon forget and repeat the same mistake until you make it ritual and it begins to define you. i am not longer me, i am the superhuman exuding bodhi. all ways.

remember this. you vote every time you use dollars.

you’re life. orange dawn.

it all falls on me as i drink from the spring.

i don’t bear the costs. lion.

sometimes, you, just, don’t, get it. i gave too much. ?

went over to john’s today. got some ice cream with jd. went to a cabin. drew. exchanged glances with sierra. i still can’t hear yet. got nervous next to natalie. i am not sure why. then got obliterated in chess. i fell apart and played unorthodox. i tried to intorduce variant instead of playing my core and allowing him to deviate. my impatience and lack of focus left me dead.

pitiful.

i just didn’t have the integrity to make it work. and the i left empty handed. after being told by the rock that it’s melting my brain. you’re right, and i tried to make an escape, but i tried to go too far and do it all at once, and i am no where near prepared to do that. and again, i fell, correction, am falling into the same pit of despicable failure.

fall some more.

then maybe you will rise up. take the occasion. shine with greatness. endure the cross and embrace the sorrow.

tomorrow will be one year.

hallelujah.

i vow commitment.

i am losing my mind. i got destroyed at chess when i was a move from checkmate.